Air Candy

More 'pecifically, it's the IPA

Colleen Devaney Season 1 Episode 23

ACP Shorties
In this excerpt from the cutting room floor, we're talking about a few things that really rattle our rails. 

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__created by Colleen Devaney & Seth Spears
__edited & produced by Colleen Devaney
__independently produced in Maryland by Good Job, Weener Productions

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Key Words: IPA, beer, craft beer, new year, Lyme

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00:00:06 Speaker 2

Alright, alright so this is me again.

00:00:10 Speaker 1

Actually I have a couple things.

00:00:12 Speaker 2

Oh, good because.

00:00:14 Speaker 1

But I'm not going to rattle as long you know what I mean?

00:00:17 Speaker 1

Like I get like some things rattle my rails.

00:00:19 Speaker 1

I'm just like.

00:00:20 Speaker 1

Annoying, but I don't go on and on.

00:00:23 Speaker 2

Shut up.

00:00:26 Speaker 1

That's why this is.

00:00:27 Speaker 1

Basically your segment.

00:00:28 Speaker 1

However, I did find something that was kind of like getting under my.

00:00:31 Speaker 1

Skin, I'm like why?

00:00:33 Speaker 1

Why lately, and I'm like I gotta say something.

00:00:35 Speaker 2

This is our segment you see now you have a chance you have a platform now where things that really rattle your rails.

00:00:42 Speaker 2

You can talk about.

00:00:42 Speaker 1

Yeah girl talk through my teeth about him, no.

00:00:47 Speaker 2

Alright weaner, So what the hell is rattling your rails right now?

00:00:52 Speaker 3

I just have to say what is up.

00:00:54 Speaker 3

With the people.

00:00:56 Speaker 1

And I'm I love you.

00:00:57 Speaker 1

If you're a friend of mine and you've.

00:00:59 Speaker 1

Done this, but still what is up?

00:01:01 Speaker 3

With the people who say happy New Years.

00:01:04 Speaker 3

Plural happy New Years.

00:01:07 Speaker 3

Happy New Years.

00:01:09 Speaker 1

Hey happy New Year.

00:01:12 Speaker 1

Huh, huh?

00:01:16 Speaker 1

Like plural, what it's year one are no S happy New Year, just the same as like Lyme disease.

00:01:24 Speaker 1

It's not lymes disease, it's Lyme disease.

00:01:27 Speaker 1

Happy New year.

00:01:30 Speaker 2

OK, so this is where I have to agree with you and not agree with you.

00:01:35 Speaker 1

No Lord.

00:01:37 Speaker 2

Because it can be used both ways.

00:01:40 Speaker 2

First of all, if.

00:01:40 Speaker 3

It can be used on New Year's Eve, Happy New Year's Eve, but not happy New Years.

00:01:46 Speaker 1

On the day.

00:01:47 Speaker 2

There's New Year's Day, not New year day.

00:01:51 Speaker 3

Right, But if you, if you say it, you would say Happy New Year's Day.

00:01:52 Speaker 2

Right?

00:01:54 Speaker 3

You don't just say happy New Years.

00:01:56 Speaker 2

Well, you're just shortening it.

00:01:59 Speaker 2

It says instead of saying I want to go to tgi Friday's, we say I want to go to Fridays.

00:02:03 Speaker 1

This this is true.

00:02:05 Speaker 1

OK fine, but this is going into the whole realm of like the your and the your and the two and the two.

00:02:10 Speaker 1

You know what I mean?

00:02:10 Speaker 1

Like all these, like grammatical things that kind of like bug.

00:02:13 Speaker 1

Me from time to time.

00:02:15 Speaker 2

And yeah, you know it's kind of one of those things that ****** me off too.

00:02:18 Speaker 2

Along the same lines it is 'cause I.

00:02:20 Speaker 2

I think it's kind of stupid too.

00:02:21 Speaker 2

All right, well, you know what along the same line, this is gonna be my rant on this thing.

00:02:25 Speaker 2

This is really, you know it's rattles my rails to the same thing.

00:02:28 Speaker 2

Where like people say.

00:02:29 Speaker 2

See you next year like.

00:02:32 Speaker 2

You know a couple days before, yeah, they're saying.

00:02:34 Speaker 2

I'll see you next year.

00:02:35 Speaker 2

Oh yeah, we gotta do.

00:02:36 Speaker 2

This next year you mean couple days.

00:02:40 Speaker 1

Yeah, I actually did that with my at the crisis Center when I worked my last shift.

00:02:45 Speaker 1

Before you know 'cause I worked on New Year's.

00:02:47 Speaker 1

Eve and I.

00:02:47 Speaker 2

All right, see you next year.

00:02:47 Speaker 1

Was like when I signed off like soon after.

00:02:50

I did.

00:02:51 Speaker 1

And I knew, and I knew that it's, uh, it was stupid and dorky, but I did it anyway, just 'cause I knew that somebody out there would be rolling their eyes.

00:02:58 Speaker 2

Oh my God, I'm rolling my eyes right now that's.

00:03:01 Speaker 2

Like oh Lord.

00:03:02 Speaker 1

See you next year.

00:03:04 Speaker 2

I know that, yeah, that that's my and you know it.

00:03:06 Speaker 2

This is probably less hurt.

00:03:08 Speaker 2

Love, but I've heard a lot of people say this.

00:03:11 Speaker 2

Instead of saying Valentine's Day Valentine.

00:03:14 Speaker 2

Times days.

00:03:16 Speaker 1

Yes Oh my God, yes.

00:03:18 Speaker 2

Do you know how to read?

00:03:20 Speaker 1

Me, I know there's so many.

00:03:22 Speaker 2

Happy Valentine's Valentine's.

00:03:26

No, I know.

00:03:27 Speaker 2

What it is when you talk about this Valentine's?

00:03:28

Oh wait.

00:03:29 Speaker 1

Instead of something being specific it specific, I have very something very specific to tell you.

00:03:31 Speaker 2

Oh, it's telling them give me a date.

00:03:35 Speaker 2

Oh Pacific what?

00:03:38 Speaker 1

There's so many of these.

00:03:41 Speaker 1

More specifically.

00:03:45 Speaker 2

I mean the Pacific Ocean.

00:03:46 Speaker 1

It's more specifically I would like to ask you to be my Valentine's.

00:03:51 Speaker 1

On on New Year's

00:03:51

Please be my friend.

00:03:57 Speaker 1

There's so many of these.

00:03:58 Speaker 2

I know there's so many, you know what my mom used to call this and and then we'll go to the next section, but this is probably specific to my mom.

00:04:06 Speaker 1

OK.

00:04:07 Speaker 2

She used to call Walmart Walmart.

00:04:09 Speaker 1

's help.

00:04:10 Speaker 2

No, hey, what?

00:04:11 Speaker 2

OK?

00:04:11 Speaker 2

Walmart, Walmart.

00:04:14 Speaker 2

Like what are you talking about it it's Walmart.

00:04:17 Speaker 1

On purpose or for to be silly.

00:04:18 Speaker 2

I don't know.

00:04:19 Speaker 2

I think she's just saying on purpose.

00:04:20 Speaker 2

She didn't say it with a smile.

00:04:21 Speaker 2

I'm going to Walmart.

00:04:24

Like what are you?

00:04:25 Speaker 2

Talking about where is Walmart, there's a Walmart.

00:04:28 Speaker 1

Where's this Walmart and check it out?

00:04:29 Speaker 2

Oh my gosh, Oh my.

00:04:30 Speaker 1

It's like when I say target instead of target, but that's to be funny, yeah?

00:04:33 Speaker 2

Yeah, but that's on purpose.

00:04:35 Speaker 2

Yeah, my mom says Walmark just because she.

00:04:36 Speaker 1

I do know people say.

00:04:37 Speaker 2

Doesn't know any better.

00:04:37 Speaker 1

Walmart, and they're like in Virginia, West Virginia.

00:04:42 Speaker 2

Well, because there's so many well, there's so many Walmarts down there.

00:04:42 Speaker 1

It's going to Walmart.

00:04:45 Speaker 2

That's got sand in plural.

00:04:46 Speaker 2

I'm going to the Walmart.

00:04:47 Speaker 2

's what do?

00:04:47 Speaker 2

You mean go?

00:04:48 Speaker 2

Yeah, I'm gonna want.

00:04:49 Speaker 1

The the the meaning singular is being poor OK?

00:04:49 Speaker 2

More than one mall Walmart.

00:04:55 Speaker 2

Yeah, we can go all day with these things that really **** me off.

00:04:57 Speaker 2

You know it's ******* me off just talking about this.

00:05:00 Speaker 2

It fits me on.

00:05:00 Speaker 1

That that's that.

00:05:01 Speaker 1

That was my.

00:05:03 Speaker 2

All right, well, that's a pretty.

00:05:04 Speaker 2

Good ramp thanks, I have.

00:05:06 Speaker 2

A this is a beer related rant too.

00:05:09 Speaker 2

I probably already ran about this just in passing, but beer drinkers out there fight me.

00:05:15 Speaker 2

If you don't agree with me, OK, what is up with the IPA craze? People in the breweries with these IPA's?

00:05:23 Speaker 2

Has been out of control for.

00:05:26 Speaker 2

I'm going to say eight years probably and I am tired of it.

00:05:29 Speaker 2

Whatever happened to the breweries having a good selection of beers that they have there?

00:05:34 Speaker 2

There's so many different styles out there you don't have to have eight different kinds of IPA's out there. Say, Oh yeah, do you guys have IPA? So yeah, we have a black IPA. We have a double IPA. We have a pale ale.

00:05:44 Speaker 2

We have a triple IPA.

00:05:46 Speaker 2

We have a hazy IPA.

00:05:47 Speaker 2

We have a hazy juicy IPA.

00:05:49 Speaker 2

I mean it keeps going on forever and ever and ever and ever.

00:05:52 Speaker 2

It makes me crazy so you go to a place they have 10 beers on tap 7 or IPA's, or pale ales whatever.

00:06:01 Speaker 2

And then they have a half of isenor a farmhouse ale like.

00:06:04 Speaker 2

Come on, there's nothing I can't do I.

00:06:06 Speaker 2

Can't drink any of.

00:06:06 Speaker 2

This I can drink the IPA's, we can only drink so many after a while it is crazy man. I recently went to went to Texas, went to Austin.

00:06:17 Speaker 2

I went to this one brewery.

00:06:18 Speaker 2

They knew what the hell they were doing.

00:06:20 Speaker 2

They had a black IPA.

00:06:22 Speaker 2

They even had an IPL.

00:06:23 Speaker 2

OK, that's fine.

00:06:24 Speaker 2

You have a couple of these things.

00:06:26 Speaker 2

That's OK, but then they had a dark beer.

00:06:28 Speaker 2

Then they had like a saison.

00:06:30 Speaker 2

Then they had like they had like a.

00:06:33 Speaker 2

A barleywine so they at least had five or six different styles where I can try not five or six different IPA's. It drives me bananas and people just stop doing it.

00:06:46 Speaker 2

Just stop.

00:06:47 Speaker 2

It makes me crazy.

00:06:48 Speaker 2

I can't take it so.

00:06:51 Speaker 3

Yeah kid.

00:06:51 Speaker 1

I can't take.

00:06:52 Speaker 2

It no, it drives me crazy.

00:06:53 Speaker 2

I know that's.

00:06:53 Speaker 2

Miring, I know you don't drink beer like that, but you know that.

00:06:56 Speaker 1

I wish I could.

00:06:57 Speaker 1

'cause honestly I love.

00:06:59 Speaker 1

I love the smell of beer.

00:07:01 Speaker 1

I love the taste of beer and I just can't drink it.

00:07:06 Speaker 2

Yeah, I know that still probably gives you bubble guts.

00:07:06 Speaker 1

Well, I'd like to.

00:07:08 Speaker 2

Got all that yeast up in there.

00:07:11 Speaker 1

Well, a lot of.

00:07:11 Speaker 1

It is not gluten free, obviously.

00:07:15 Speaker 1

And yeah, it just makes me not feel good.

00:07:18 Speaker 2

I've had some gluten free beers that actually don't taste.

00:07:21 Speaker 2

Bad, they're OK.

00:07:22 Speaker 1

I would like to try those, but no, it does not give me bubble guts.

00:07:25 Speaker 1

Thank you very much.

00:07:26 Speaker 1

Anytime I say I have.

00:07:26

Don't rely.

00:07:27 Speaker 1

An issue with that he's like, could you give?

00:07:28 Speaker 1

People goods.

00:07:30 Speaker 2

I can see you right now.

00:07:31 Speaker 1

Doesn't that?

00:07:33 Speaker 2

Clean your dinosaur slippers.

00:07:35 Speaker 1

Kind of sports lovers.

00:07:37 Speaker 2

Well I just fix.

00:07:38 Speaker 2

Are you with these big puffy slippers in him saggy pajamas?

00:07:42 Speaker 2

You gotta 'cause you, you drink some beer.

00:07:44 Speaker 2

Then every step you take here just shoot.

00:07:45 Speaker 2

Now bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep.

00:07:46 Speaker 1

No, you got me all wrong, but thanks.

00:07:52 Speaker 2

My bad, my bad.

00:07:55 Speaker 2

Safety safety.

00:08:01 Speaker 2

He just shooting all the weight of Afro you nasty ***

00:08:05 Speaker 1

Or, as my cousin Norris would say, fluffed because it wasn't late 'cause girls didn't toot or fart, they fluffed disgusting.

00:08:15 Speaker 1

Yeah, what's what's better Tooting or flipping?

00:08:17

I don't know.

00:08:19 Speaker 2

Depends on who you ask I guess.

00:08:22 Speaker 2

Oh, that's funny.

00:08:23 Speaker 2

That is great.

00:08:24 Speaker 2

That is great.

00:08:26 Speaker 2

So rant over, we actually got 2 rants in.

00:08:28 Speaker 2

That's great.

00:08:29 Speaker 1

Yeah, three almost.

00:08:30 Speaker 2

Yeah, three.

00:08:31 Speaker 2

Well I kind of backed up.

00:08:32 Speaker 2

I backed up your rant with my extra ran on top.

00:08:34 Speaker 2

Of the other, and then I did another one so.

00:08:36 Speaker 2

I'm sort of.

00:08:36 Speaker 1

That is what happened.

00:08:37 Speaker 2

The plenty more rants out there.

00:08:39 Speaker 2

I'm always ranting.

00:08:39 Speaker 2

About something so it.

00:08:40 Speaker 2

Is what it is.

00:08:40 Speaker 1

Yes, yes, and I will do my best to try to come up with more.

00:08:43 Speaker 1

Rants on my.

00:08:44 Speaker 1

End 'cause I have a lot of.

00:08:45 Speaker 1

Stuff pent up.

00:08:46 Speaker 1

And stuff then I need to let that shadow.

00:08:49 Speaker 2

Yeah yeah you know, yeah you should.

00:08:52 Speaker 1

Really should.

00:08:53 Speaker 2

Because I will just back you up.

00:08:56 Speaker 1

Thank you.